I'm not entirely sure what to write, but I know I've got to write something. I figure I'll just put fingers to keyboard and see what thoughts spew forth.
Lately, I've been feeling a bit of a slump spiritually. It's not uncommon for me to go in cycles of spirituality, but this time, it's a bit different. I haven't felt the desire - well... That's not true. I've been pretty much actively rebelling against the pricks of the Spirit telling me to pray, read the scriptures, magnify my calling, etc... This has been going on now for probably close to a month. It's semi-frustrating, but not entirely.
December 2008 was probably one of the most stressful months of my entire life. No joke. I think back to all of the teen-age and young adult heart-breaks and general stressfulness of life back then and that doesn't hold a cande to the stress I felt last month (and very much potentially for the next couple of years).
I'm not entirely sure I want to go into a level of detail which catharcism requires, but most of the stress has to do with a real-estate deal I made 2 years ago this coming March (which may go bad, or may not - but either way will cause me to stress until something is worked out), the coming of my in-laws for Christmas (which worked out really well, but before forgiveness was honestly given, it caused me more stress than any 2 weeks of my life prior.), and general unhealthy self medication due to this stress - which has caused me more stress.
Thank heavens for video games. Guitar Hero - World Tour has been fantastic. Sadly, it's not as stress-releasing as prayer would be, but for some reason, I'm rebelling against that for now. Well... I still pray, but not nearly as much as the Spirit says I should. I wouldn't be writing this down if it wasn't for a prayer I said about an hour ago.
Ummmm............. What else....
My job has been particularly stressful lately, as well. The company itself was super solid until another company sort of acquired us. They don't "own" us, but there was a merger between another company and us, and the details as to who gets hacked and who gets merged is still to be determined. My job at Nature's Way happens to be a job which is going to change
period. Either I'll be moving to Wisconsin in the next few years to continue working with the new merged company, or I'll find something else. (or, in a perfect world, I would be able to work for the company in Wisconsin from home, but I won't even consider that yet. It'd be too perfect).
I'm working on another song now which really, really, really, really needs a guitar. This frustrates me because the only instrument which I consistently need, cannot find a suitable sound for through MIDI, and which I don't know how to play - is a guitar. I've gotta learn how to play the guitar. Dangit.
Other than that, ummm..... 2009 should be interesting.
For 2008, I was all optimistic
. For 2009, man, if I can get through it without declaring bankruptcy, without having to go into foreclosure, and am able to keep my job, or find another one which competes with it, holy cow, I'll consider myself blessed beyond measure - because right now, all of the aforementioned is 100% possible and moreover, quite probable as well - if I don't play the cards right. I'm definitely going to have to be on top of things this year because a lot is at stake.
Ummm..... That's about it for now. Boring, yet informative.