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Mon - Jan 23, 2006 : 07:46 pm
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FHE Tonight... My Testimony.
We've been trying to get into the habit of having Famiily Home Evening together as a family, and tonight Sarah planned a splendid lesson that would have been enjoyed much more if I wouldn't have been ill, and dead-tired. But... such is the life of a husband/father/bread winner. :)

Anyway... After the lesson, she wanted all of us to write down our testimonies, so... This is going to be mine.

As far as my life goes, I have no doubt whatsoever about the existence of God. This has been proven to me personally time after time after time after time. From the indications of His love to me as a teenager while driving home from a harsh night with a girlfriend, to my finding job after job after job during my marriage. Now, one might be thinking, "What does *that* have to do with the existence of God?" Well, my friend, to you, it might not. To me, it is infallible proof. I don't know how to explain it, but it's the little things like that on a week-by-week basis which make the total sum a reality of God's existence as much as that of my own. But most of all, I've lived without God's spirit in my life, and I've lived with it. The divide between the two extremes is just that much more proof to me that God is really there. Besides, there's an easy equation to my own finding out pretty much all of my testimony:

"When I live according to what I know to be true due to my prayer, studies, and diligence in obeying the commandments, my life as a whole is much better, much brighter, much more vivid, clearer, and *much* more full of love." It is *not* easier in the sense that easiness is a life devoid of work. It *is* easier in the sense that the work comes much more easy due to the clarity and vigor with which my life is lived.

Something else I know, but, for me, is harder *to* know because of the sacredness surrounding this subject, and my own unworthiness, is the existence of and sacrifices made by my savior Jesus Christ.

When I am living according to my knowledge of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I come to a fuller realization of Jesus Christ and what He did for me. The Spirit whispers truths through love to my heart and it fills me with His Spirit. That spirit teaches me about Jesus Christ and who He really is and what He really did for me. Often it brings me to tears when I learn about this subject because it is so intensely personal to me. It's hard coming to the knowledge that a real being suffered so much real pain..... for me. It's much easier to set it aside and go on with my life than it is to ponder, pray, feel, and really learn about this. Yet... When I do, along with the painful realization of my own sins and necessity for repentance comes the humility required to bring about the sweetness of receiving genuine forgiveness from that same being to whom I caused an innumerable amount of suffering. This brings about the part of my life and my testimony that I love the most: Love. This whole journey of sinning and repenting and honestly striving to become a better soul brings about so much love in my life.... and I love it. It brings meaning and purpose to my life, other than just running around "doing" things out of the necessity for their doing. It brings about the true charity of life, which I believe is defined as "Doing something out of love, rather than doing because it needs to be done".

There is much more to be said, but suffice it to say moreover than that which has been said: I know the Book of Mormon to be true, that Joseph Smith is a prophet of God and that everything else brought about by those two truths is also true.

And that's that.